Okay. I will address this one time and one time only. So pay close attention.
What you see here on this blog is just a GLIMPSE into my life. While it may seem like I get incredibly personal at times, please understand that more is left unsaid than said. Now that being so, any conclusion that you formulate about me as a person based on this blog is strictly your perception. Yes, you are always entitled to your opinions. But please understand that you aren't operating with all of the information.
Now. I love Bishop's daughter. If I didn't love her, I could never love him. If I didn't love her (or at least give a damn), I wouldn't waste a second of my time on her or the sometimes foolish things that she says and does. Only the two of us are there when I'm talking to her about personal hyigene. Taking her to get her hair done. Staying up WAY past her (and my) bedtime after I've worked a 14-hour shift on my feet to make sure she's prepared for a test the next day. Reminding her to watch her calories. Schooling her on what to wear to compliment and not detract from her shape. Taking her to church. Picking her up from dance class. Correcting her misbehavior. Spending money that I don't have so she'll never have to know struggle. The two of us. She and I. Things that my mother did for me. The way she did them.
Her father trusts me to take care of his daughter the way that her mother doesn't seem to be able to. If he didn't, I wouldn't have lasted a day. Now, do I correct her? Yes. Do I occasionally embarrass her? Yep. Do I hurt her feelings sometimes in the name of teaching her a lesson that life wouldn't teach her quite so gently? Hell yes. I am not here to be her friend. I have friends and so does she. I'm here to model how a woman and a lady should live. It doesn't always feel good. It doesn't always sound sweet. She's a child. Not an adult. I do not demean her. I do not condescend to her. I never say anything here that I wouldn't say to her or her father's face. I was not always close to my mother, which you would know if you've been reading from the beginning. But I never, NEVER doubted that she loved me. And as an adult, every harsh word spoken between us has meaning now. Every time that I cried because I felt she was mean or unyielding. She wasn't trying to be my playmate. And it didn't matter one bit to her that I was angry with her. Because she saw what I couldn't: the woman that I could become if I listened and did what she said. If you think parenting a child that you didn't give birth to is easy, I invite you to try it.
This blog has jokes. Funny ones. Jokes that sometimes seem harsh to some who don't know me. But to those who do, you know that I am never snide or mean. Only real and matter of fact. Embrace it or not. But do not judge it. And do not judge me.
7 comments:
I've been reading your blog for quite some time and even though you share only a "glimpse" you still seem personable.
Anyway I don't understand where some of those comments came from, my mother treats me the same way. You are doing a great job, X. What you are doing with the girl is just simple authoritative parenting. Children who are raised in this style grow up to become competent adults.
YOU are doing a great job and YOU know that.
No need to really present an argument in my opinion. You are doing you and people who can't relate haven't done the same thing. But who has? Everybody's situation is different.
And you hit the nail on the head when you say, "if he didn't trust me with his daughter, I wouldn't have survived day one." You are so right. My dad has three daughters and they do not play with their kids.
You are doing a great job. My current stepmom is quite good. Too bad it too my dad two failed attempts to get it right.
Keep up the good work. It takes a strong man to take in a woman and her kids that aren't his. You are the example of a woman doing the same with her man and his child that isn't yours.
YAAAY X!!!
get it bitch. people need to realize this is a blog. if you don't like what you're reading, push on to the next one. unless some sort of feedback is requested, gon 'head and keep the sideway comments to yourself. you gotta put in time for that.
Joy- thank you for saying that. I really was starting to internalize that criticism. Please... my mom punked me ALL the time! I'm cool.
V- thanks, man!
Stace- Yeah, I'm all about comments. If you don't agree with me, that's cool. I just can't abide being judged.
Girl keep doing you! Bishop's daughter will thank you one day. Thanks for what you said. I thought I was crazy but my son's father is with this chick who HATES my son and mistreated him when he stayed with them. I kept saying she cannot love my son's father if she can NOT love or even try to like his kid. And I mean real mistreatment. That bitch was crazy with the silent treatment, ignoring him, rolling her eyes all that stupid petty shyt. All this to a kid. He was afraid to tell me or his dad so he told his grammie. Needless to say I got my son out of there. I still want to put hands on her but I am a lady. So I am doing one better. Getting my son his father back. LOL! :) She will always remember me. He is the ex I will always love and now I 'm TAKING his azz back!
WORD.
Meant to comment a long time ago but I am always late with a comment. Anyway I wish I had an extra mom like you. My dad's girlfriend couldn't stand me and made it clear when I was younger. She didn't spend time with me or treat me like I mattered. My dad stayed with her and still is with her. She likes me now--she finally figured out I wasn't trying to get my parents back together and my mom didn't want my dad on that level. Anyway you are doing what a woman "should" do in this situation. You are teaching Bishop's daughter to be a better person and prepare her for the world b/c no one else is able to do that at this time. Trust and believe she will know that it was done out of love when she is prepared for some crazy situations.
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