Who Am I?

You are tall like me. We both have long thick hair. My eyes are brown too. Are you her? Basketball? That's my favorite sport also. Size 11? Yeah, my feet are pretty big. Are you him? You laugh like me. I danced when I was younger too. Do you have a sister? Maybe... nah, couldn't be.

I was always loved and cherished and spoiled and beholden. At least at home I was. I never felt less than or different or out of place. At least not while I was at home. My aunt never quite treated me equally, though. She was always trying to undermine my family relationships. She was always trying to downplay my accomplishments. She was always jealous. She always tried to pass that on to her daughter as well. And for a while it worked. For a while I fought my mother. For a while I allowed my aunt's hatred to infiltrate me. I doubted my mother, I shut her out, I ran away. But I always came back. And eventually, we won. We survived. We laughed. We loved. Each other. Deeply. I was hers. HERS. Not the adopted child of another. Hers.

But now there's news. "Those" people are more than just an abstract concept. They know me. They've watched me grow. We've crossed paths. They live in Hampton Roads too. Just like me. But I don't know them. Watching me. Learning about me. But never approaching me. How? Why? And now my mother is gone. But still nothing. No words. No letters. No unknown people at the funeral. Who are these people? Do I know them like they apparently know me?

Well I'm on a mission to find some answers. By this afternoon, I need to know. And I know just who to ask. So... stay tuned, I guess.

Hodgepodge

So I'm bored to death. Literally to death. I'm actually in a coma right now, but I'm still able to blog because I'm just that hot. I apologize in advance for the randomness of this post, but I'm sleepy.

Joy, sorry about not getting back to you with that post about the tattoo yet. My internet is out, so I'm blogging from the Sidekick and my pictures are on my computer. Hopefully I'll be up soon.

The DMV is the devil. Just found out that my license is suspended in not one, but TWO states. Goody. So now I have to pay almost $650 to get that bitch reinstated. Double goody.

Not too much longer on this night shift. CVS never pays me correctly and I'm turning into a vampire. So I posted my CV online and am seriously considering an offer I got yesterday to go back home and work for Walgreens. A bitch is tired and I need sunlight before I become tranparent!

How come people don't call you back when you KNOW they see your number on their missed calls list? And then when you ask them whether they've gotten your messages, they say, "um yeahhh... just been busy, man." Okay. I get it. I've been replaced.

Why is family such a heartache? No... that's my next post. Maybe around 5 a.m.

I love him to pieces. But I would like to choke his daughter out from time to time. Why does a 13-year-old have a myspace page saying she's 17? And why does said 13-year-old get a phone call on her cell at 12:19 a.m.? FROM A BOY? And why do I have to physically restrain him from slapping her off the 3rd floor balcony while he's yelling, "I will NOT have a fast ass daughter!" Whew! Messing up my fresh manicure and whatnot...

Maybe more later. I have a customer. **smooches**

Jarrod's Turn

1. If you couldn't express yourself with words, what you use?
Oooh. That's a good one, J. To know me is to know that I am HEAVILY dependent on words, written and spoken. But if I couldn't use them, I would use... you're killing me. I have no idea. Sign language, maybe? I'm a loser :(

2. You wake up and you're dead broke. Who do you call?
Bishop. I know he has my back.

3. Which of the five senses could you do without?
Smell. Who needs it? So many odors are unpleasant that I could DEFINITELY do without my sense of smell. I need my sense of touch because I'm such a touchy feely girl. Sight of course because I just can't imagine not seeing the people and things that I love. Hearing I need because I am just so damn nosey :) And taste. Well... you know.

4. What's the hardest thing you've ever had to admit to someone?
Man, honey. You're really in the mix on this one. Umm... that I was pregnant.

5. Is Ne-Yo's album really that bad?
Um... it so is. And I'm out. But before I do, can you PLEASE answer my questions?

Jameil Walters, Pt. 2

Okay. So after I picked up my face and reapplied it to my head from reading the lovely Jameil's blog, I realized that I need to answer her follow-up questions.

1. What is your goal for your life?
Well... I want to be happy. A long time ago, I thought that meant wealth and "stuff." But after personal loss and reevaluation of my priorities, now all I want is love. I want to be a wife and mother. Period.

2. What would you consider personal/professional achievements?
Personal - see #1. I want to live the kind of life that would make my mother proud. Professional - I want to find my niche in pharmacy. Hopefully consulting for a large company. I just want people in my field to think of me and say, "she's on her game."

3. When Garfield broke up with you, did you think that you would never get married?
Yes. Yes. Yes. Absolutely yes. He was the love of my life. I prayed for him. When he made the choice to move forward, I was devastated because I saw my future in his eyes. I was CONVINCED that I would never get married. But now.... it's all good.

After Much Ado.... The Boonopolis

My God, I am OD'ing on blogger today. I really need to be in the bed right now because I haven't slept in almost 40 hours. But I wanted to FINALLY give a face to a name. Here are some pictures of Bishop. Shout out to my boonopolis, sigh.

Interview by Lala La La La La

Oh Lord, I'm mixing that Rihanna song into my life again! DAYUM La!!! Were you monitoring my phone call last night? I was just having a conversation with a very good friend, and some of these EXACT topics came up! But I love it.... no offense, Jam, but I was kinda hoping for some more personal questions from you! Here we go...

1. What was the exact moment you realized you were in love with your current boonopolis?
My "current boonopolis?" Girl, are you high? When was that exact moment? I would love to say something terribly cheesy and romantic like I knew from the moment that I saw him, but that would be some bullshit. It was really rather basic. He asked me if I loved him, and I realized right in that very moment that I did. It wasn't that I hadn't thought about it before, but it wasn't until I heard him ask the question that I knew the answer.

2. What made you wanna be a pharmacist?
I actually never wanted to be a pharmacist :) I always wanted to be a doctor and never really thought about anything else. I was a premed major when I was in undergrad and then went straight to medical school. I just wasn't ready to be there and I did terribly. So I took some time off to reevaluate my options. Several of the girls that I had become friends with down in Chapel Hill were in pharmacy school there, and that planted the seed. I still didn't really want to do it because all I knew about being a pharmacist was counting by fives. But I really didn't have any other options that would keep me close to my original plan, so my mother suggested I apply to Hampton, and the rest is.....

3. Since we've been talking about Greek affiliations, correct me if I'm wrong but you're a Delta right? What made you choose DST?
You are ABSOLUJTELY right, I a Delta. Like so many other people, every woman in my family with whom I have any kind of a relationship is a Delta. I spent my childhood sitting in the back of her chapter and committee meetings when there was no babysitter, and all of her chapter Sorors used to call me "Sahrah Monique." So it seemed natural to want to go that route, but believe it or not, I did actually read up on the other organizations. Then I waited until my senion year and took the plunge.

4. This may sound like a stupid question but hear me out: are there times that you wish your mother hadn't passed away? Or has the experience been necessary to shaping you into the woman you are?
I wish that every day. But I also realize every day that it was necessary for me to grow up. I was a baby - mommy's baby- for my entire life. A lot of it was her and how overprotective she was, but it was also me. I loved being around her all the time, I throved on the constant pressure and encouragement from her... I just wanted to please her. But it wasn't until she died that I began to realize FOR REAL that I had to start living for myself. Thinking about it more, I realize that I don't actualy wish that she hadn't passed away because then that would mean that she would still be here in pain. She lived her life. She accomplished so many things and was loved by so many people. But most of all, she loved me, and I took that and moved forward. Dammit girl.... I was doing so good with this, now I'm all teary and stuff!

5. What prompted you to start blogging?
I met a guy that I liked and he had a blog. One day he let me read it (I don't remember how we got on that topic), and I liked the idea. I already loved to write, so I saw it as an opportunity to air my thoughts out without actually seeing the people who were reading it. I got hooked, so thanks PYT :)

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I'm loving this interview thing... anybody else????

Interview with a Vampire

Damn, I can be so clever sometimes! Here are my responses to Jameil's interview questions (see her blog for details) at 5:46 a.m.... I'm doing this from my Sidekick, so I can't see the original wording of the questions and I'm paraphrasing. Hope that's cool.

1. What's the craziest thing you've ever done?Oh, you mean besides saying yes to this damn job? Well, I would tell you, but what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.

2. You get on a plane. Where do you go?Bora Bora. I am DYING to go there, but I'm trying to hold out for a really fabulous honeymoon.

3. You don't say much about your dad. What's your relationship with him?My mom adopted me when she was 34 (1977) and single. So by the time she met (1981ish) and married (1984) my dad, we were already Thelma and Louise. Plus my dad has always worked these crazy third shifts, so we only saw each other when he picked me up from school or on the weekends. He was always the more lenient parent and the one who always gave up the money. We're cool. He takes care of things and I appreciate him for that.

4. Last year, Hampton's Homecoming sucked. If you go this year, how would you make it better?
From what I understand, doesn't it ALWAYS suck? I have never really done the homecoming thing from either a student or an alumna perspective because I grew up there. My mom and I were huge football fans, so we'd go to the bazaar, tailgate, go to the game, then roll out. Even now, that's all I really do. I wasn't an undergrad there, so I don't really go to catch up with people. And the parties... not for me. Sorry! I'm such a lame :(

5. Which stores do you shop at? If you had unlimited, which ones would you hit up?
My favorites right now are Banana Republic, H&M, ann Taylor, Nine West, and Nordstrom, Whole Foods, and Stop 'n Shop (ever the foodie!). If I were wealthy? My goodness... Bergdorf Goodman's, Neiman Marcus, Bloomingdales, Tiffany, Bottega Veneta, Gucci, Chanel, Louis Vuitton, Jimmy Choo, Cartier. Fendi... I'm CLEARLY a bit of a label whore, but the last six are strictly for accessories and shoes :)

If you want to get in on this interview thing, post your 5 in a comment, and I'll get right back to ya!

Jiggy? Maybe Not So Much

The barbecue... boo hiss. And that's all I have to say about that. Well maybe not all I'm gonna say, but... man. You can take the boogers out the hood, but you most definitely CANNOT take the hood out the boogers! Thanks to Bishop's cousin Greg for geting us on the guest list for such an affair as this. Okay, let's backtrack.

The Smith's live in Brynmawr, PA. Lovely house, PHENOMENAL property... maybe five acres of beautiful green grass, trees, tennis court, pool, basketball court, and stream separating them from the neighbors. The front gate is up on a hill, so you go down into the property. They had private massage tables set up in this gazebo and a woman doing facials, manicures, and pedicures by the pool. There was a tattoo artist also (real needles, folks). One of Will's sisters was the official hostess of the barbecue... whew! And moving on. Every hoodtastic friend she has met in her trek from West Philadelphia born and raised was there... EVERY one. But no Will and no Jada. Bar and food set up on the tennis court. Agaiin, no Will and Jada. **WAHHHHHH**

But the part that I saved for the end (and BY FAR the most remarkable) was this. There was a woman walking around with these long Patra braids. She was really skinny with capri pants and a tshirt. Nothing crazy here, right? Oh yeah- forgot to mention that she was wearing lucite heels and swinging from a pole. A POLE, people! At Will and Jada's house. Outside. In the backyard. Yeah. She was giving lessons on pole dancing and the fine art of the lapdance. **SIGH** No, I did NOT partake, before yall's silly asses even ask.

So after about two hours of barbecuing with nobody more famous than Cristal (like the champagne) the aforementioned "dancer" and Chris Paul the NBA player, Bishop and I decided to call it a day. As we're hiking up the hill to the street, lo and behold a Mercedes S550 and a Range Rover appear at the gate. "Honey," I say. "Let's see what other coonery might be arriving." So we wait and we FINALLY get our Black star power in the form of Tisha Campbell, Duane Martin, Lisa Raye. Will, and Jada. They get out and come over to greet the remaining few people there who weren't family. Jada and Will are CRAZY cool. Very casual and VERY much in love. It was a good vibe all around. They invited us in for drinks (it was getting dark out), so we got a chance to hang out for a second. Greg had to leave, and we didn't want to look like the losers who won't leave, so we left too.

And that, my children, was the barbecue.

Back on the Scene Crispy and Clean

I am such a slacker. I realized this as I was reacquainting myself with my blog family. Couples have broken up, people have new jobs, vacations have been taken... man, I am out of touch. But like I said earlier in the week, I'm back. With a vengeance. So if you start reading posts about the world's most random things, blame it on my need to really get back to blogging. Cuz I missed yall, man!

I started doing Grateful Wednesdays because I saw it somewhere and loved the idea. I'm bringing it back, but I'm also realizing that expressing gratitude ahouldnt be limited to just one day. So today I am grateful for...

My life, lately more than usual. Life is just so short, ya know? Gotta grab onto it.

Whoever it was that wised up and sent Paris Hilton back to jail. What a ripoff, right? "Medical issue," my ass. That bitch was scared of jail! Period.

The fact that my car is still running. Man, I REALLY need to take it in for some maintenance before it quits on me. Come on, September. I need a new ride!

Knowing somebody who knows somebody. That secondhand connection never fails to come in handy.

My love. I had forgotten what it was like to love and be loved like this. As La (I think it was) said recently, that Sunday kind of love. It's special. Difficult sometimes. Complicated at others. But it's love. He's my love. And I love him.

P.S. Has anyone else heard the remix of Rihanna's "Umbrella" with Chris Brown called "Cinderella?" Ella ella ella ay ay ay...... **SIGH.** I'm addicted to singing that and I don't even like the song really. "You can be my Cinderella under my umbrella. Ella ella ella ay ay ay." **Double sigh**

Gettin Jiggy Wit It

First off, PYT please turn off your hate sensor. This is for those who aren't yet familiar with how I plan to spend my Sunday afternoon. Now I realize that some may not be terribly impressed by my plans because they won't see the big deal. Others will feel that by blogging about this that I am showing off. Well, boo to both groups. It is and I am. So with that said..... I'ma break to the crib to change my clothes once more cuz I'm invited to a barbecue that starts at four.
If you're a woman or man of a certain age like myself, then you'll realize that that means I'm going to eat hot links and potato salad at Will Smith's house. YES!!!!! After I was JUST saying the other day how I need a famous person to have my number saved in their cell phone... I'm going to a cookout at the Fresh Prince's house! Yall know I'm starstruck, so I'm SUPER geeked. So now I'm off to find something to wear that doesn't scream H&M or Banana Republic, but also doesn't cause me to have to work an extra week to pay for it.
I. Am. So. Damn. Excited. Nananananana... gettin jiggy wit it :)

It's Too Damn Late

Nobody should ever be up this late and be required to be at an actual place of business! It is 2:35 in the morning and I am at the good CVS. I'm supposed to be off this week, but trying to be nice to someone (and needing the money), I agreed to cover their shift. So now I'm on the phone with a former classmate and fellow CVS employee, reminscing and simultaneously reintroducing you guys into what's going on in my life.
So I have been inspired by the growth of others, and I decided to get back on the wagon. I've said it before, but this time its on the level... I'm back. I've been busy with work, but even busier with.... ladies, are you ready? Falling in love. **twinkle, sparkle** Yes, it's true. Visions of weddings and honeymoons and houses and babies are dancing through my head. I haven't really said much about my new relationship because I was afraid to jinx it. Only now have I achieved some level of comfort where I feel good about sharing details of my personal life without worrying about some stupid anonymous blogger saying some hurtful bullshit.
So, you heard it here first: I am finally in love again. And it's sooooooo good (except when it's not!). Things have worked out with the Bishop wayyy better than I thought they would. He's eight years older than me, so that brings with it a whole new set of stuff. He can be QUITE set in his ways and sometimes I want to STRANGLE him! But he's teaching me how to communicate on a completely different level.
So I'm back. I'm working. I'm tired. But I'm in loooooooovvvvvve :) Smooches!!!!