The Voice of Why Not

OK, guys.... I am going out on a limb today, so please bear with me. I had to apply for an award at school, and the only criteria were that the written form not exceed two pages, and that the theme was "The Power of Why Not." So now you know what I knew - very vague, and very open to interpretation. I have already submitted my essay, but I really want to know what people who don't know me think of the final product. So please read this and offer your criticism. The things I am most interested in are: does it fit the theme? Does it speak to you? Would you vote for it? Anything else you have to say would be great as well. Thanks!!!! Deep breath.... here we go.

I hear the voice every morning when I get out of bed. “You really should hurry along! Time waits for no one!” Sometimes I even have to take a look around because the voice is so clear and so strong. I hear the voice when I am driving to school. “Watch where you’re going now! You can’t be so close to that man’s bumper!” Sometimes I glance at the passenger’s side and barely suppress a curt response. I hear the voice when I am sitting in class. “Make sure you get all of that! You never know what’s going to be on the test!” Sometimes I roll my eyes in my mind, because to do so outwardly would NOT yield a positive result. I hear the voice when I turn the last light off at night. “Don’t forget to say your prayers. You have to stay on your knees if you ever want to get anywhere in life.” I hear the voice in my dreams. “Don’t doubt yourself. You don’t need me - stand strong and know that I will always be with you.” That is when I have no response. No quick glance to the side, no rolling of the eyes… that is the voice I listen to. That is the voice that guides me. That is the voice of childhood authority and adulthood guidance. That is the voice of my mother. She was the light that showed me the way, she is the reason I can even be considered for such a prestigious award. Dr. Sharon White-Williams lived the power of why not, and today so do I.

I never realized how extraordinarily lucky I was to have found myself in a home filled with such love and happiness. Mine was an upbringing filled with knowledge and learning, laughter and jokes, teaching and support, God and inspiration. Understanding the power in “why not” was a life lesson in our home where self doubt was not allowed and “can’t” was not a word. When others doubted the wisdom of her choice and bureaucracy threatened to steal her dream, my mother asked herself “Why not adopt her? I can give her a life filled with all the things she would ever need to become a woman, and I am the one God has chosen to lead her journey. So here I stand on the foundation of why not.

I was always the youngest child in my class because my mother insisted on beginning my learning in our home. The refrigerator was cluttered with magnetic letters and the bookshelves sagged under the weight of Where The Wild Things Are and Amelia Bedelia. Why not teach her? Why not show her that the future of an intelligent and well-educated Black child in America shone brighter than the August sun? Why not turn to a book before a television or write a story before a love letter? There was power in why not, and my mother was stronger in that power than any woman I knew. When the road to understanding and knowledge seemed closed even to me, hers was the voice of reason and calm. When I tasted the bitterness of failure and couldn’t figure out how to keep going in the right direction, hers was the idea that brought me back to the path. “Why not try pharmacy school, Monique? You could come home to Hampton and we could be together again!” She saw what I couldn’t see. She knew what I didn’t know. She possessed what I was too afraid to embrace. She believed in me. So here I am, poised on the edge of academic success and buttressed by the power of why not.

I speak often of her voice. The calming, reassuring, authoritative, commanding, beautiful voice that I hear everywhere I go. It never occurred to me that one day I might not be able to hear that voice anymore. The summer of 2002 brought a pain and sadness to my life that I hoped to never know, but as always, it was survived with the power of why not. “I have cancer. The doctors say that there is nothing they can do. But I have to make it. I have to make it for you.” That is the voice I remember the most. The voice that carried the worst news of my life, and the voice that convinced me to keep living. Why not hope? Doctors operate on science, but we operate on God. Why not live? No man was meant to be here forever, so why not take each day to celebrate our pasts and plan our futures. Why not pray? He has never given us more than we can bear, and He will continue to keep us in His will long after our arms have grown tired and weak. Why not trust? Why not love? Why not grow? These were the questions that brought me here, and unfortunately they have brought me here alone. My mother made it as far as she could, and along the way, the child that she loved became a woman that she admired. The living voice became silent on September 18, 2003, but the power and legacy of the message live on. So why not? There is power in those words, there is power in their history. My future is a blessed one, an ordained one, a predetermined one. Even I am not aware of the potential curves and obstacles that might lie in my way, but I know that the voice will never let me stop moving forward. Dr. Sharon White-Williams knew the power of why not, and today because of her voice, so do I.